Tuesday, March 31, 2009

John Mayers Pregnant?

Hello Upper California Coasters, Gossip Guy here. And, no, John Mayer is not pregnant. That would just be an insult to Jennifer. I kid, if she wanted a baby, she would've had one by now. She does NOT want to ruin her body Now. But anyway, according to John Mayer's Twitter (yes, I follow him. Shut up), he has post departum depression. I have no idea what it is, although I'm guessing it has something to do with depression, and actually I really don't care if he cries while he stuffs his face full of pickles, just as long as he doesn't drown any babies. You know, what happened to the old days, when John Mayer wasn't a douche-bag? You know, circa 2003 when he was still relatively unknown and still kinda cute. Yes, I said he doesn't look good anymore, got a problem? Anyway, just dropped in to give you that little bit of information. Oh, and, memo, I'm gonna stop posting here for a little while until my other blogs get on their feet, post-number-wise. Oh well, got to go, I'm working on a post about Twitter for Pink & Turquoise, and freaking YouTube is doing fucking maintanence right now, and I can't get the embed thingy to work. Beazy Fasheezie. I'm Out, Worship me Bitches!
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My Odd Obsession with Death, Hollywood, and my need to take over the world that I can't shake

Why do I like to wander cemetaries? Why do I love Marilyn Monroe, James Dean, Gene Kelley, Princess Diana, Humphrey Bogart, Spencer Tracy, Katherine Hepburn, Aubrey Hepburn, and, suprisingly, Paris Hilton? Why can't I shake the yearning to take over the world and have the world population wait on me hand and foot, fanning me with enormous palm leaves, and buying me anything I desire. I don't know. Some people call me crazy, psychotic, pyro-maniacal, bi-polar, or insane, but its just me. Over time I'm going to reveal the method to my madness, but for today, all I'm going to reveal is this; My one true goal in life, if the world domination thing doesn't work out, is to be famous for nothing, and be treated like royalty. All I Want to be is, quoting one of the people I just talked about, Loved By You. Every single person alive. I want to be a house hold name. Just you watch, one day I'll be smiling from the center of the stage at Grauman's Chinese.