Hello Upper West Coasters! It's your beloved Gossip Guy, and it looks like LiLo has made headlines again, as a thief. Yes, three weeks ago, she walked out of an N.Y.C. club with the coat on, except it's owned by a Columbia University co-ed, who got it from her dead grandmother. The girl saw it in OK! Magazine last week and set her Ivy League lawyers to work. She claims it came back reeking of cigarettes, booze, and had a tear in the lining. By yesterday it was patched up, and the stupid "Innocent" bitch and was demanding a 10,000 dollar rental fee. I personally believe, that LiLo is entitled to borrow it for at least a week, and that bitch should be thankful she wore it, because she can now sell it on eBay for double, maybe even triple the original price. Now, some of you may be saying "Mink!?", well hippies, SHUT THE F#%$ UP! I Loooooooovvvvvvvvve fur, and intend to own snow leapard, leopard, puma, viper, mink, bear, fox, wolf, and Bay Tiger coats, the grey fox one I will wear as I perform at the 90th Annual Academy Awards, which of course by then, I'll be 50 pounds lighter. While I'm still on the 
subject, LiLo is also prepping for her seven episode arc on Ugly Betty. She'll be playing a bakery store clerk who moonlights as a hard partying clubber. No idea how that connects to the cast, but I'm interested, especially after Christian Siriano guest starred last episode, who I have been quoting for a while, you know, "Worship Me Bitches". Moving On! This also reminds me that Ugly Betty will be moving, as, even though it's based in New York, filming is done in Sunny, Sunny, Hollywood, but no more, this June they start filming in New York. Actually Moving On, Brit-Brit appeared in court today, and got more visitation rights! Although K-Fed still has sole physical custody, and by the way, K-Fed isn't fat for all those who haven't come out of their house in a year, it was just Pop Fiction. In other Gossipy News (valley voice), the MORONISH Jonas Bros. are going to start filming their concert-movie just like Hannah Montana the Whor-a, honestly, anyone who likes the Jonas Bros. needs an ear candling done so they can f%#&ing hear the shit they spew. I'm Out, Worship Me Bitches!
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