Tuesday, June 10, 2008

COVER UP FIRECROTCH!

Hello Upper West Siders, Gossip Guy here, and this fag is disgusted by LiLo's new ad for Visa Swap. Apparently her Marilyn Monroe recreation wasn't distasteful enough. I mean, who wants to see this bitch, I mean, really, what man would want to go out with her, she's just such a hot mess right now. God, I hope she doesn't do playboy, or else the mansion's gonna have a new red carpet. FIRECROTCH! Obviously I was always on Paris' camp during the feud. To sum it up, COVER UP FIRECROTCH! The thing is, the organization isn't so bad, turn in old clothes for the needy, and you get cash points on your Visa card. Goodbye Cambridge Classics, Hello Burberry. MOVING ON! Shia La Beouf dropped the faggot bomb, calling his friend one in a recent YouTube vid. Frankly, I don't see the big deal, this fag uses the word all the time, well not ALL the time, but if I'm really pissed, or just being soooo gay, there's no other description. He says he's soooooooo embarrased. SHUT UP. MOVING ON! Rumors of Nicole Kidman posing nude in Vogue a La Demi Moore, have been disproved by the fact she had a very expensive dress commisioned just for the shoot. MOVING ON! George Clooney recently kept a promise to let one of his ex's (Sarah Larson) best friends use his Lake Como villa for their honeymoon. Well, nothing else for today, see you later if I have any babbling to do. I'm Out, Worship Me Bitches!


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My Odd Obsession with Death, Hollywood, and my need to take over the world that I can't shake

Why do I like to wander cemetaries? Why do I love Marilyn Monroe, James Dean, Gene Kelley, Princess Diana, Humphrey Bogart, Spencer Tracy, Katherine Hepburn, Aubrey Hepburn, and, suprisingly, Paris Hilton? Why can't I shake the yearning to take over the world and have the world population wait on me hand and foot, fanning me with enormous palm leaves, and buying me anything I desire. I don't know. Some people call me crazy, psychotic, pyro-maniacal, bi-polar, or insane, but its just me. Over time I'm going to reveal the method to my madness, but for today, all I'm going to reveal is this; My one true goal in life, if the world domination thing doesn't work out, is to be famous for nothing, and be treated like royalty. All I Want to be is, quoting one of the people I just talked about, Loved By You. Every single person alive. I want to be a house hold name. Just you watch, one day I'll be smiling from the center of the stage at Grauman's Chinese.